They said what?

HOW TO RUN THE 100M...

I woke up at 11, sat around, watched TV, then I had lunch, some nuggets, then I pretty much went back to my room and slept for another three hours, went back, got some more nuggets, and then I came to the track," World record 100m holder Usain Bolt reveals his secret recipe to success.

Surely, there's a sponsorship chance for KFC?

WHAT'S WRONG WITH A BUS? 

In November, Manchester City star Robinho was spotted taking his girlfriend to the mall using a public bus.

The Brazilian is the highest-paid player in the world and gets a cool £160,000 (Dh 932,000) weekly salary, yet he opted to buy a £6 ticket and hop on the double-decker bus to the local mall.

"He sat downstairs as if it was the most normal thing for a multi-millionaire footballer to do," said one shocked passenger. "Word quickly went round about who he was. Nobody quite believed it and some just stared open-mouthed. At the very least you'd expect him to be driven by a chauffeur or maybe, at a push, pay for a taxi. But a bus?"

What a great tale to tell your grandchildren, about that time you and your mate Robinho took a bus trip.

TOILET HUMOUR 

"The story of me being locked in the toilet by Tiago is true. It's a shame it got out, as this was something I told a friend in confidence. In any case, Alessandro Del Piero responded to the noise of me punching the door and offered to break it down," Juventus president Giovanni Cobolli Gigli was left red-faced when Tiago's trick filtered out to the media earlier this year.

TEMPER, TEMPER

Just a week after his appointment as Newcastle manager, Joe Kinnear went out of his way to make friends with the English media by setting off on a five-minute rant that consisted of 52 swear words at a press conference in September.

Kinnear is no stranger to fits of anger, he even started his initial one- month contract with a two-week touchline ban – held over from 2004.

BEST OF BRITISH

You have to love the British commentary.

At this year's British Open some stunning quotes were aired and, of the two which really stood out, one was an introduction to golfer Stephen Ames.

"Stephen Ames – a Canadian, born in the Trinidad and Tobago, with an English father and Portuguese mother – that's one confused individual going for a birdie now."

Viewers of the golf Major also managed to catch another memorable line from the commentators after Ian Poulter sunk a birdie.

"Poulter punches the air and screams like a man who has just rolled over to discover he spent the night with Jessica Alba," was the colourful description of the Englishman's celebration.

'WE CHEATED IN THE ASHES'

In August, former England opener Marcus Trescothick came out with a damning revelation claiming, "We cheated in the Ashes."

The cricket world paused and stood with bated breath to hear just how England had cheated to beat Australia in 2005 – only to be told it was due to 'Murray Mints'.

Trescothick said he sucked on the sweets then shone the ball with the saliva to keep the the ball in good condition. This came just a week before he was due to launch his autobiography. The things people will do to sell a book! 

THE SAVAGE TRUTH

"We have decided to give him a promotion. He is our new tea boy and he is doing a great job. Robbie has been going around making tea and that is great to see. I know there will be a lot of people thinking that he is going to be sulking. He is not happy that he is not in the team at the moment. But making tea with good grace means he is still part of what is going on and that is the most important thing for me," Derby manager Paul Jewell lets Robbie Savage know his place at the club, after the player complained about not featuring enough.

THE WHEELS ARE COMING OFF

"If they had to take the fight against doping any further, they'd have to come and live in my house. I've been tested by the AFLD (French anti-doping agency), by the UCI (International Cycling Union) and by Wada (World Anti Doping Agency). I have to give the authorities three months notice of my whereabouts, even if I want to take my kids to the pool or go to the cinema with my wife. Does anyone have an idea of what we go through?" German cyclist Jens Voigt was pretty upset by the the amount of drug testing being conducted ahead of the Tour de France.

It obviously wasn't enough though, with five riders still getting caught for doping at cycling's showpiece event. With the sport in such a state the only way it could have got any worse would have been if Lance Armstrong tested positive. Luckily, he is retired now. Oh, wait...

WHAT GOAL?

Referee Stuart Attwell and linesman Nigel Bannister combined to award the most abysmal decision of the year in a Watford-Reading game at Vicarage Road.

The ball went out for a goal-kick following a corner, yet somehow a goal was awarded to Reading without a single player claiming anything.

The match finished 2-2 and the result stood.

STILL SO SPECIAL 

"I do not think I am the best coach in the world, but I also do not believe there is anyone in the world who is better than me," the ever-popular Jose Mourinho thrills the Italian media when appointed coach of Serie A leaders Inter Milan in June.

The 'Special One' has learnt to speak in fluent Italian for this job, so there is no way he can be misquoted.

GOOD HEAVENS!

"The people who threw their robes on the ground when Jesus rode on a donkey were the same people who crowned him and hit him with sticks and stuff like that, and were the same people who said afterwards how we shouldn't have done that. So that's exactly what they do. You have to look at history, it's repeating itself, and I'm not saying that I'm God," Springbok coach Peter de Villiers preaches to the journalists to spare him at a press conference in August.

The World champions finished bottom in the Tri-Nations and he was in clearly in search of a miracle.

THOSE HARDCORE AMERICANS 

Americans are not quite as hardcore as they make out to be in Hollywood movies.

Rod Marinelli, coach of the Detroit Lions, who have played 15 games this season and lost all of them, was asked by the press if the reason he hadn't sacked his defence coach was because he was his son-in-law and he replied: "I lead the meetings. I know what I want!"

It was the story of last week for the American press, who all reported on how tense the press conference was. Oh my, how lovely it would be to read their articles after doing a press conference with Joe Kinnear, Sir Alex Ferguson or Roy Keane?